When is the last time that you thought that to yourself, and you weren't just trying to calm yourself down? When is the last time you actually felt that? That feeling of security----that everything is okay. Not that it is going to be okay, but that it just already is. Until about a half an hour ago, I don't remember the last time I thought or felt that. But just like children always do, they shift our perspective and offer us light.
I'm not aiming for any type of romanticism in this piece. This is the real deal. Perfection does exist.
I was trying to put my ten month old to sleep. Our little, loving peaceful Dahli Mama (don't worry, she still poops and cries and gets sick and wants to be held 24/7 just like every other kid) but she does all of that while still having that spirit inside of her.Her innate character. I was trying to put her to sleep, but she just wasn't feeling well. Her tummy was gurgling and she was just flip flopping in my arms. I thought maybe she just wanted to be laid down, but she didn't. I unwrapped her (she was swaddled) and sat on the floor with her laying on my chest. And she was happy. She slept and I could smell her sweet little banana-breast milk baby breath. Have you ever smelled baby breath? There is a reason there is a flower named after it. Smelling baby breath is like smelling life in the making. Fresh and unwritten.
The fact that I, her mother, held her on my chest made everything okay for her. That just blew my mind while sitting there. For my baby, at that moment everything was perfectly okay. She was perfectly safe. Perfectly comforted. Perfectly loved. She felt all of that. And, it all came from me. In that moment, I did a few things, perfectly.
Have we forgotten that everything is okay? Not all the time, but, a lot of the time it is. We just forget or choose not to acknowledge it.
Right now, the world could use more moments...minutes of perfection. We could use more feelings of, "Everything is okay." Because when we feel that, it means we feel loved, or we feel secure, or we feel hopeful or faithful.We feel accepting, understanding.
We need much less moments and minutes, and days and years of nervous or disappointed distraction. Moments of fear. Moments of making it through. For some people, those latter feelings are not an option (and for you who think they are, think again, my friends), BUT, for most people, they are. Own it. Change it.
I happen to be a person who lathers myself in those latter thoughts and feelings and actions, but I also know I can fight them. I want to. Because in that moment of perfection, when holding my baby, when I told her "Everything is okay," and I actually believed it, I felt free. And freedom is most likely the feeling truly most sought after by humans.Freedom from trial, freedom from flaws, freedom from pain, freedom from themselves, freedom from the man. FREEDOM. People die for it every day. Tonight, I felt why they do that.
Right now, if you are reading this, everything is okay. I'm telling you, it is. If you don't feel it. Go hug someone. If you don't have someone to hug, go read a poem. If you don't have a poem to read, sing a really great song. Our lives are what we make of each moment. What's happening in the White House right now? Don't care. What's Just Bieber doing? Don't care. Are we going to have enough money for those bills? Don't care. What's happening in Russia? DON'T care. Don't care. A lot of the time I choose not to know about what's going on because I feel like the weight of the world is on my shoulders. But right now, I don't care what people think. They call it ignorance, I call it being human. Right now, everything is okay. And I love that. And, I love that a ten month old taught me that.
